I want to know what you think . . . You can post a comment why or why not?

I am in a debate with a friend of mine.   I would love to know your thoughts.  Please feel free to leave comments.

We need men to be honest in the church.

Sacrosanct Gospel

Yesterday I wrote a post called “His Face Never Changes” in which I called attention to the male tendency to mask our weaknesses by maintaining a calm, cool demeanor.  “Never let ’em see you sweat” is the facade that many men use to gain social capital with other men.   Unfortunately many Christian perspectives on masculinity do not make a break from this fleshly commitment.  The current Christian emphasis does not work toward, or even allow, a ‘gospel vulnerability’ that learns to find strength in weakness (click here to see what I mean).  Instead most Christian teaching joins right in, accentuating a kind of “John Wayne/Don Draper” approach to Christianity.  Don’t cry.  Don’t admit weakness. Don’t admit failure.  Never let ’em see you sweat.  Get stuff done for the kingdom.  Sadly, this works for a while.  It is very appealing.  It sounds good:  Let’s go kick some butt…

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ONE WEEK TO GO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am so excited!!

I cannot wait to share with you

the redesigned website!!!

This is the only sneak peek I am going to give.  It is the theme of what is to come!

I look forward to sharing with you next week!!

If you want to be a writer or artist of any kind . . .

Jeff Goins wrote this excellent book on

to inspire, challenge and guide you

towards living your dream

as a writer or  artist.

Some quotes that I found inspiring to me on my writing journey . . .

Whether you’re starting to tackle writing for the first time or a lifelong veteran, rest assured.  There is better work you’ve yet to create.  If you will make one important choice:  Stop writing for accolades, and start writing for passion.

Before others will believe what is true

about you,

you’ll have to first believe it yourself.

When you stop writing

for readers’ affections,

your work will affect more people.

Stop waiting for permission and

prepare to do the work.

There are no big breaks.

Only tiny drips of effort that

lead to waves of momentum.

You can purchase this book and learn more about Jeff Goins @ www.youareawriter.com

I have learned so much from his blog post @ www.goinswriter.com 

NOTE FROM JOYCE:

*** Don’t forget to come back on May 30th and see my redesigned blog!!!! ***

For the women and men that may still be struggling with healing from a painful past. God Loves You and desperately wants you to know.

Blooming Lotus

I had an interesting “vision” (for lack of a better word) last night. The first half is safe for all readers. I have included religious triggers for the second half of the blog entry.

As I have shared before, the holidays are tough for me from Halloween through New Year’s Day. I still don’t know why. I feel tense as bedtime approaches, have trouble staying asleep, wrestle with nightmares, and then feel exhausted the next day. Last night, I was praying about all of this, especially for relief from the pressure and emotional pain. Here is what I “saw”…

I was walking in the parking lot of my church toward the church building. I “zoomed out” so I could see myself from the outside, and I was this buff warrior woman, like an Amazon. (Trust me – Nobody would describe me physically like this!!) I had bulging, strong muscles, and…

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Do you like surprises? . . . . .

Well, I have one for you

in three weeks!!!!

I am changing things up on my blog.  

A new look!  A different approach!  

I am so excited, and can’t wait to share!

I will have some new people to meet.

Come back on May 30th to see what’s NEW.

Sign up to receive updates by email, and you will be notified as soon as I go live!!! 

Sign up in the Email Subscription box at the top right under my picture.

I do not spam. I Promise!!  If you are not as excited as I am about the changes, you can unsubscribe at any time.

Happy New Year!

Thank You Crosscards for such a great picture.

Visit www.crosscards.com for great wallpapers & e-cards.

HOPE in the New Year!

The year 2011 is officially behind us now.  A brand-new year brings many brand-new possibilities.  It is my hope that you see the hope in this New Year. Whatever happened in 2011 is done.  You may be dealing with some of the same issues, but there is always hope from God, because He can give you wisdom on how to handle every problem.

I found this great chapter in Psalms this morning.  Take a moment soon to read Psalm 86! Here are some great verses from this chapter.

“O Lord, You are so good, so ready to forgive, so full of unfailing love for all who ask for your help.  Listen closely to my prayer, O Lord; hear my urgent cry.  I will call to You whenever I’m in trouble, and You will answer me.”

                                                                                                                ~ Psalm 86:6-7 NLT

What is your cry for this year? 

How do you want to live differently? 

Call out to Your Heavenly Father,

and He will hear your urgent cry!

My cry for 2012 is to live in closer fellowship with God so I may be more bold in sharing the Good NEWS to as many as I possibly can.  This can be face to face or even through my blog.  I am not the only one with this cry in my heart for our nation and all those around the world to turn to Jesus.   Check out this video on the main page of their webiste at One Cry , and read their blog!

There are other cries in my heart that are more personal.  The most important one is for my fourteen-year-old son to grow close to God and make his faith his own.  I know this is a process, but I pray the process starts this year. Whatever your cry may be to get a job, change jobs, to keep your house from foreclosure, to get out of debt, to feed the poor, to go on a mission trip . . cry out to God, and He will hear it.  I suggest that you write it out, and surrender it to God.  Pray for it daily and watch Him move in your live.

It is my prayer for many of you to join me with the One Cry movement!  I will be writing about the movement as I learn more about it too.  I am thrilled to see there are so many others with the same cry in their heart.  If this is not your specific cry, that is okay.  However, I do pray that you will ask God to burden your heart for the lost.  That is our primary purpose as believers is to share God’s amazing message with all we can!

Please feel free to share your cry.

 I and many others will pray for you. 

Forgiveness is the Key

The Wound

Have you ever been so wounded or abused by someone whom you swore you would never forgive them?

After talking with a close friend of mine recently, I was thinking about our conversation.  Anna (not her real name) is healing from a tragic childhood abuse of the worst kind. Over the past year, she and I have become very close as I have helped her deal with this horrible pain that keeps rearing its ugly head in her life.

Recently, a good friend of Anna’s almost died; Anna was very distraught about her friend. This friend has reached out to Anna just a few months ago. I think it would be good for Anna to work on building some friendships that she has cut off over the years. She fears letting others into her world, because they may hurt her. She has been betrayed by two very close friends. I mentioned not everyone wants to hurt her, and that she is missing out on the friendship and love of others. However, they are missing out on what she can offer them as well. As I was mulling over her fears one day, and through some reading and praying I realized a missing link in Anna’s healing and seeking friendships. Forgiveness . . .

She struggles to forgive the monster who stole her childhood and innocence. I can completely understand. Who would not? However, he is stealing her life now, and he is deceased. She is afraid to live. Her pain doesn’t stop with this one person it seeps into all her relationships. She is on a journey of healing, and will have a story to share with others. There are so many people out there just like her who nobody knows the hell they are living in. She will be their voice one day. God has a plan and a purpose for her, as He does for each of His children.

Open Hearts

Here is the connection I made for my friend to complete her healing. She needs to forgive the monster. Not because he deserves it. Not because he is dead. We forgive, because God has called us to forgive everyone as He has forgiven us (Eph 4:32). This will not happen in a moment, but will take time to peel back the layers of pain, grief and sorrow by releasing it to God. Somehow God has designed it when we quit clutching our pain and forgive those who hurt us then our heart is open to love and forgive others. You see my friend is clutching her pain tightly, and has for so long that it hurts to even look at it. Forgiveness looks impossible, because it has become a part of her like having a permanent scar from a gash 20 years ago, but the pain does not go away. However, God has promised us that if we make the decision to forgive – EVEN if the person NEVER asks for it – He will complete the healing process for us through the power of the Holy Spirit.

Will it be easy? No. Will it be worth it? Resoundingly YES! Ask anyone who has forgiven the murderer of their child, the cheating wife or husband, the prodigal son, or the betraying friend, they would tell you the same. It is hard to describe what God does in your heart when you are obedient to forgive. You are able to look at the pain, and not feel the deep wound anymore. The anger is washed away. Joy and love take up residence where all the poison used to reside. You make room for God to fill your heart with His love that spills over into others even the one that has hurt you the most.

For me, I have someone whom I forgave for a horrible thing they did to me a long time ago. I now just feel sorry for them. To be honest, I don’t feel a gush of love for them, but I love them as a part of God’s creation. I don’t know if they have Christ or not. If they do not have the love of Christ in them, they are missing out on so much life!

So Hard to Believe

Corrie ten Boom had a similar excruciating painful experience as my friend. She and her family were severely abused in a German Nazi Concentration Camp. She watched her sister starve to death days before they received freedom. Her family was put in a prison camp for hiding Jews from Hitler’s regime. After her release, and in the midst of healing from all the torture, she spoke at a meeting in Munich, Germany about what she had been through in the camps and about God’s forgiveness.

Afterwards, a former guard came up to her, and said that he had become a Christian recently, and he wanted to personally ask her forgiveness. She remembered him. She remembered being paraded by him naked. He stuck his hand out in an offering of peace and forgiveness. It was all she could do to shake his hand. She knew that she should, but she had this internal battle raging. She finally extended her hand out to shake his and when she did, she could feel the power and presences of God move from her shoulder down to where her hand met his. She had this overwhelming sense of love for the man. The forgiving power of God overwhelmed her. You see she stopped clutching her pain, and could forgive and love through the power of God.

Forgiveness Is . . .

Forgiveness is more about letting go of our right to be hurt, than it is freeing the other person from their responsibility. Forgiveness frees us to love others more deeply. I know it is hard, because there are times that I struggle with it too. When you are repeatedly hurt by the same person for the same thing over and over again, you want to curl up in your corner to have your pain party. Although, that is not what God designed us to do. Unforgiveness holds us in bondage and keeps us from the pure love that God has for us and the love we could share with others. Forgiveness is the key to get out of bondage.

Is there someone you need to forgive today? Maybe you need to forgive yourself and allow God to heal you. We are to be responsible for own actions, but that does not mean we drag that mistake, sin, or pain with us for the rest of our life as penance. This is the beauty of God’s design. His mercy and grace wash away our sin and our pain to open our hearts to be filled with His love. I pray that you allow Him today. Forgive as you have been forgiven by the Almighty Savior and Friend. He will flood you with His love.

This verse below became real to me during a particularly difficult time in  my marriage.  God revealed to me that He had forgiven me and I needed to forgive my husband just like He forgives me.  Talk about a spiritual 2 x 4!

Ephesians 4:32 “Instead, be kind to each other,

tenderhearted,  forgiving one another,

just as God through Christ has forgiven you.”

Please feel free to share how forgiveness helped you or any other comments on this post. I look forward to reading what you share!

Merry Christmas . . .

Merry Christmas from my house to yours . . . 

And yes, this really is my house!

I hope this is a season of joy for you, but for many this is a tough time of year.  I know of many who have lost loved ones this year and this will be the first Christmas without them.  Keep those people in your prayers as you go about your plans for Christmas.

I have missed posting blogs recently, but I am back to work!  Be on the look out tomorrow for the next one!  I am working and back in college to complete my teaching degree.  So, life is busy for this mom to say the least.  

In the midst of the hustle and bustle slow down and take time to focus on our Savior who came into the world to bring us the best gift of all . . . Eternal Life!  Focus on Him and over the next year pray for a revival in your life, the life of your family, and your community.  Revival begins with us.  I love the quote you see around this time of year “Wise Men still Seek HIM!”  Seek Him daily for a fresh word from His word, and peace in your heart no matter what the day may bring!

Jeremiah 29:12 – 13 NLT

In those days when you pray, I will listen.  If you look for me wholeheartedly,

you will find Me. 

 

You asked about . . .

You asked about . . .  Finances

Recently I conducted a survey from my readers

to find out what was on their mind.

 Survey says . . .

(Think Family Feud

for those old enough to remember).  . . .

FINANCES

was the number one concern.

I would have to agree that has been a major concern in our family for the past couple of years too.  As with many people in the past few years, my husband lost his job and was out of work for six months.  If we had not built up our  savings, we would have been in a world of hurt.  Well, let me correct that statement.  If my husband had not saved, we would have been in a world of hurt.  My husband is more disciplined to save than me, and I love to spend.  We manage our money together.  He keeps the checkbook balanced, and I make sure the bills are paid on time.

For those of you that have not made savings a priority yet I am here to say like Nike . . . “Just do it.”  Even if it is only $5 a month till you can do more.  Make it a habit today, or well over the next 21 days!  Yes, it is very hard, and I know that some people may not be able to save right now either.  Just like us, many people are in survival mode.  You can make it a game to look for ways to save, create a budget and stick to the plan.

Three things to help your financial status now:

1. SAVE – general recommendation  is 3 -6 months of income.  I prefer 6 months in this economy, because it takes a while to get another job.  If you have nothing in savings right now, Dave Ramsey recommends a goal of $1000 to begin, or if it is easier to accomplish start with a goal of $500.  Then reset your goal until you have the three to six months in savings.  Yes, this make take a year or more to accomplish.  This is your emergency fund, but more on that next time.
2. Create a Budget aka ‘Cash Flow Plan” – Look for ways to cut expenses. See NOTE Below.
3. Ask the question, “Do I have the cash to pay for this right now?” Answer honestly. This has been the hardest lesson that I have learned through this trial, but applies at all times of life.  This question has curbed my impulse spending tremendously.  I literally will ask myself, “Do I/we have the money for this right now?”  Most of the time the answer is no, and I have learned to wait or plan a purchase.  Sometimes it is something that I really can live without, but just wanted at the time.  “If you do not have the cash for it, then you cannot buy it.” 

So, save, save, save . . .  It is more glamorous to have cash than to have credit card bills.  So the next time that cute outfit screams your name or for the men, that gadget begs to go home with you, ask yourself the question “Do I have cash to pay for this gadget/outfit?” Usually you will know the answer without consulting your bank account balance.

We are called to be good stewards of the resources God gives us.  An important resource for most of us is our family income.  When we are being obedient to God’s word in the area of finances, it leads us to be more disciplined in other areas of our lives.   Yes, there may be times in our lives that we desire to be good stewards, but our best efforts are to no avail.  Over the past year, I had great difficulty finding a permanent job.  For about 4 months I did not have a job.  All you can do in those moments is pray and ask God for wisdom and guidance on what to do.  I didn’t like it, but there were payments skipped when I was not working.   I finally got the chance to catch up in August when I found a permanent job!  Praise the Lord!

God saw my heart and knew that I wanted to pay my bills on time.  Actually, I prayed about it long and hard many days.  Remember that your credit score and your bank account balance are just a number.  (Should you care about them, and take responsibility for your financial decisions? Yes!)  They do not define who you are.  Only God can define us!  I am his precious child whom He loves dearly.  He loved me so much that He sent His ONLY Son to die on the cross for me, so that I may have a clean and open relationship with Him.

NOTE:  Sign up to receive my post by e-mail (I do not share your e-mail with any third parties!) as they are updated, and I will send you a simple budget form that is easy to use  with instructions on how to use it monthly.   This is a great tool to help you get started on your savings goal. On the right, towards the top of the page you can sign up under E-mail Subscription.

Share with us your money-saving ideas AND/OR how has you and your family weathered the economic storms over the past four years?

JUST QUIT!

Guest Post by Casey Sollock

www.QuitToGrowRich.com

 

Do you ever feel like the only purpose you have in life is to make it through the day…only to wake up the next day to do it all over again?

 

Do you sometimes feel like you are running through life on a high-speed treadmill, going as fast as you can but never really getting anywhere?

 

Do feelings of unhappiness and stress overwhelm you?

 

Does your relationship with God need revival?

                                                      

THEN QUIT GOING THROUGH THE MOTIONS!

 

My name is Casey, and I’m the founder of QuitToGrowRich.com.  The question I love to ask my coaching clients is, “What do you need to QUIT to lead your richest life?!”  So, that is the question I am asking you today.  Give that some thought.  Go ahead.  I’ll wait.

You see, at one point in my life I could answer yes to all of those questions above.  I was just going through the motions (and almost wasted $65,000 on law school because of it…that’s a long story that I won’t get into here!), and my relationship with God did need revival.  I was a wife and mother and had completely lost myself in those roles.  I was just doing whatever I could do to make it through the day.  I still had a relationship with God, but it wasn’t a deep, soul-satisfying relationship.  Things needed to change.  So, what did I do?

I got still.  In this crazy world of perpetual busy-ness, I had to make a concerted effort to BE STILL.  Maybe you need to do this, too.  I began to get into conversation with God again.  I started really listening to what he was saying.  I didn’t do all the talking!  Be quiet and hear his whispers.  They are beautiful.  I asked him what I was here for, what my purpose was.  I desperately needed to QUIT going through the motions and live my life intentionally.

 

So, what were the practical steps I took in order to QUIT going through the motions?

 

1.   I rediscovered my God-given strengths and began to nurture those.  What are your strengths?  How has God wired YOU?  There are multiple strengths assessments on the market.  The one I love is The CALL, a faith-based, life-purpose and vocational assessment.

 

2.  I realigned my priorities in life, and now nothing will knock them out-of-place.  Do you know what your priorities are?  Think about this and write them down.  If you let your priorities get out of line, nothing feels quite right.  Chaos ensues and so does unhappiness.

Note from Joyce:  We plan vacations and retirement with great detail.  Why don’t we create a life plan?  Isn’t how you spend your days more important that a vacation? Michael Hyatt has a great e-book (It’s short) that helps you get your priorities in order in  “Create a Life Plan” – Click on the title to learn how you can get this e-book for FREE!

3.  I focused in on what was truly fulfilling for me.  What is it that fulfills you and makes your heart sing?  WHO ARE YOU?  And, I’m not talking about all the roles you have.  Who are you deep down in your soul?  What brings you joy and happiness? God places natural gifts and abilities in each of us that we can explore and expand by learning how to be a better writer, singer, teacher, mom, wife, husband, father, create furniture, design buildings, photography or whatever that makes you get all giddy when you get a chance to do . . . . If you could have a day to do whatever you wanted, what would it be?  Is that what you are passionate about? Most likely it is your passion.

One of my favorite verses is Hebrews 12:1, “Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us.”  To me, this says it all!  Throw off everything that hinders you (QUIT!).  Anything that makes you feel like you are “just going through the motions” should be tossed aside.  God has given you a very unique and wonderful race to run!  He wants you to be purposeful and intentional.  Remain in prayer and conversation with God so that you stay on the right path…and, persevere! 

QUIT TO GROW RICH!  Quit whatever you need to quit so you can lead your richest life…a life rich in purpose, rich in happiness, rich in health, rich in relationships, rich in God!    

From Joyce:  Thank You Casey for this great reminder to BE STILL.  God must be telling me something, because in the past 12 hours I have read three different things about being still with God.  Hmm. . . . I think He is trying to tell me something.  How about you?  How hard is it to sit still and do nothing or think of nothing for five minutes? Take five minutes to focus on God and listen to His voice.  I encourage you to try it.  Not as easy as it sounds!  May God richly bless you in this time with Him! 

Please check out Casey’s Blog and send her any questions or comments through the Leave a Reply below or directly to her website.  I know it this busy phase of my life it is hard to know what to quit.  What is hard for you to quit? We look forward to hearing how God is moving in your life today!

About Casey Sollock:

Casey understands the power of Quitting, and she loves to share her message! She is a Christian women’s speaker, life-purpose coach, and author. Casey is passionate about developing women leaders so they can create their RICHEST lives.  She teaches women of all ages how to “lead their life,” even in the midst of the multiple roles every woman holds.  Her book, Should, Could, and Would, encourages leadership thinking and taking action! While its rhyming style, fun words, and engaging illustrations capture the attention of young children, the inspirational leadership message speaks to all ages!  Casey invites you to visit her website, www.QuitToGrowRich.com, for more information about her coaching and speaking, and to find out about creating your personalized Quitness Plan!